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Stories Narrative research project stories Tuning Back In
Stories Narrative research project stories Tuning Back In
Tuning Back In |
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coping strategies | dealing with past experiences | depression | divorce/break-up | education/learning | employment (+) | female | job loss | medication | money | relaxation techniques | seeing things differently | self knowledge/learning/growth | service provider | single parent | social work (+) | suicide | support from friends | support from mental health professionals | taking control | talking therapies
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Published: November 2005 This story explores how the support of a friend and professionals, as well as being able to support others, has benefited recovery. My marriage had just broken down and I’d moved to a new house with my children; I was made redundant and I was really in the depths of depression. I’d gone to group therapy at the psychiatric hospital and that was a bad experience because there wasn’t any follow up afterwards and I thought, well that’s it then, I can’t recover. I didn’t want to stay here so three times I tried to take my life to escape. In the end my best friend took me to the Social Work Department because she didn’t know what else to do. I was having financial problems because I was only getting incapacity benefit and was struggling to manage. They helped me to get Disability Living Allowance, which made me feel more able to manage because I didn’t have to worry about the rent, bills and Council Tax. I felt guilty at first taking money that I hadn’t earned but my friend said, “You’ve worked all of your life, paid your taxes and now you’re not well, so you use the money to get better.” And that’s what I did. Social Work put me in contact with a counsellor and that was a great place to start. We explored issues from the past and the present, and I started realising why things had happened in my life the way they had. We examined the ways I had coped and the ways I hadn’t coped. We worked to determine what I was prepared to put up with and what I was not prepared to put up with from people in my life. I stepped down from the pedestal I’d been placed on by the people around me. I changed all my relationships and I learned that I could say no to people without having to have a reason. I also started working with a support worker who helped me to become independent again. The first question my worker asked me was, what was my goal, where did I want to be? At this point I had been isolated in the house and couldn’t go out alone at all, and I felt that I couldn’t think about what my goal for my life was when I couldn’t even get from A to B by myself. It was like relearning how to do everything in my life from getting out of bed, getting washed, putting my clothes on and accessing my local community. I worked hard to listen to what my support worker was saying to me. I put my life in the hands of the professionals and I let then guide me back into some sort of life, because at this point I didn’t know how to get well again. I realised that I had to put trust in people, which was really difficult because people I had trusted in the past had let me down. If I hadn’t put trust in people like my support worker, I know I wouldn’t have recovered. I didn’t know what kind of life I wanted but I knew that I wanted it to be better. I worked a long time with my worker and she led me gradually from really wee steps to big life changes, like getting back to work through supported employment. My recovery journey couldn’t have happened without my willingness to recover and it was the hardest thing that I’ve had to do in my whole life. I think my recovery was helped by the fact that my worker was very observant and good at realising when I was ready to try new things. We worked at my pace, but she’d give me a slight push in the right direction when I needed it because I sometimes found it difficult to believe that I could do things. She would ask me to try things, and invariably when I did try it, it would go well and avenues for my future began to open up all around me. My worker encouraged me to write about everything I was trying in my journal and reflect upon it. I would look back over it when she was trying to get me to try new things and think, well I did that last week and I didn’t think I could, so yeah I could try this this week. I think that I gained strength from realising that I could do things if I just tried them. My GP was a great help, she really listened to me and understood. I didn’t want to take medication at all because I didn’t think that it would help, but she helped me to find one that sort of worked for me. She constantly monitored my medication and knew how I was getting on with everything, like my voluntary work. My GP referred me to the right people, like the psychiatrist and psychologist, and with all their help, my support worker, my children and best friend plus the medication, we found the right combination. I don’t feel as if the medication was the big thing that helped me to recover, I think that was down to all the hard work that I did, but the medication must have done its job as well. During my recovery I did an Open University course called ‘Make Your Experience Count’, and it was through this that I realised I didn’t want to go back to being a bookkeeper. I’ve always been a people person, and I had a lot of skills that I hadn’t recognised before; it kind of took a twist and suddenly I wanted to work in mental health. I was building up this passion to help other people because I thought, “I have been there and come through, and I can help”. I started off a couple of hours a week voluntary, and then professional and then part-time and now full time. I am recovered. I feel that I’m back in the world again. I’m more self-aware; I know what I want from life and where I want to be. I am happy and content within my soul. My life is now what I wanted it to be many years ago when it was taken away from me and somebody else dominated the control of my life. I’m aware of when I feel stressed and I use the relaxation techniques to deal with it, skills that I learned while I was recovering. If I have a bad day I don’t think, “oh my goodness, I’m depressed again”, I think,” oh this is a horrible day, what am I going to do, am I going to sit here and moan about it or am I going to do something?” – I’ll go for a drive, I’ll phone a friend, I’ll do this, I’ll do that. If the day’s rotten, I’ll try and change it and remember that we all get bad days. This story was written based on this individuals interview for the SRNs narrative research project entitled, 'Recovering Mental Health in Scotland'. More information about the project can be found in the Narrative Research Project section of our website www.scottishrecovery.net. If you’d like to share your own experience of recovery please contact This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it or 0141 240 7790 to discuss. 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Story Tags
activism community/socialising/inclusion coping strategies creativity depression employment (+) exercise female hospital male medication medication (-) peer support (informal) and befriending seeing things differently self knowledge/learning/growth self management sense of self support from family support from friends support from mental health professionals supportive spouse/partner taking control talking therapies voluntary mental health services volunteering Story disclaimer
The stories presented here are for information only. They are meant to inspire hope and show that recovery can and does happen. The stories highlight various examples of recovery and we do not advocate any of these experiences as the ‘right’ way to recover. Recovery is an individual and unique process, each person must decide for himself or herself what will work for them. Please carefully consider any decisions you make about your own recovery and consult with someone you trust if you feel unsure. See our Submit Your Thoughts pages for details on how to submit a story to us or you can contact us.
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