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Road to Recovery

Published: December 2005

This story highlights how self-determination and having a positive attitude can help with recovery.

What’s changed for me? There are a lot of things that have changed immensely; I’m more confident, I’ve worked, volunteered, and studied. I seem to be opening up more and my self-esteem is better than before. I’m building better relationships with people, I’m choosing my friends more carefully now and being wiser. I’m learning to open up to them more and to not feel stigma with my illness. My friends accept me as I am - they see inside me, the real me.

I was diagnosed with schizophrenia and anxiety. I’ve found my doctor’s advice helpful, he says, ‘To keep well is to keep active’. I just can’t sit still, I have to be on the go and be busy all the time with activities, meeting people, socialising. I don’t want to isolate myself. My long term strategies for recovery are: support from my partner, friends, family, mental health support networks, medication, creative writing, counselling, classes like Tai Chi, exercising, relaxing baths, listening to relaxing music, lighting candles, Reiki and massage. I also have drive and a commitment to my recovery and myself. I try to be positive and keep a positive focus.

I’ve had set backs, for example my benefits stopped because they were means tested. I’m not happy with the benefits system, with the government, making it harder for people with mental health problems. They should be cutting down on those who are not genuine, but instead they are taking the ones who are genuine off the benefit. I was just slightly recovered, not fully there, and they took me off my benefit. I wasn’t happy, and I was so distressed, but I had no choice but to pick myself or else I would have cracked. But looking back, I think that was a sign, it might have taken me longer to recover because I would have become institutionalised being on the benefits system and I’m actually glad that it happened, maybe it was for the best.

My family’s not been that great. My Mum has mental health problems herself, and because she’s very ill she can be very negative and that can be a setback for me because it makes my thinking negative. I try to push it aside and think positively and try not to take on board what she says. My Dad can be a bit negative, he’s the main carer right now and basically he’s a bit cynical. One of my brothers is supportive and he says to me, “ don’t take what they say seriously, take it with pinch of salt” and “Dad’s going through a rough time and so is Mum and they don’t mean what they say and they always love you.” My brother’s grown up a lot; he’s probably been to counsellors to help him deal with it. My oldest brother is really intelligent, he looks through the Internet and does a lot of research to find alternative methods and therapies. He’s trying to get me to try some of these, like eating more vitamin C vegetables; he says, “You don’t need medication” and things like that. I don’t find his attitude helpful, he doesn’t understand. For me, seeing my Doctor and Psychiatrist is what works so we can argue sometimes over that. He’s probably living in denial because of my Mum. He’s not accepted my Mum, so how can he accept me?

It’s been hard dealing with my Mum’s situation, I was disillusioned at first, and I thought the system had let her down. I wrote to MSPs and I wrote to the NSF about my Mum. I was angry, I was really, really angry at the system. I didn’t want to end up like her, being really ill, and so I had to help myself. I know if my Mum was well enough, obviously, she wouldn’t want to see me go that way, she wants me to have a good future.

My recovery from my mental health problems has been a good experience because it’s made me more resilient. I know that I can pick myself up again when I’m feeling down or whatever, and I know it’s not the end of the world - I’m stronger and more determined and I can reach my goals.

This story was written based on this individuals interview for the SRNs narrative research project entitled, 'Recovering Mental Health in Scotland'. More information about the project can be found in the Narrative Research Project section of our website www.scottishrecovery.net.

If you’d like to share your own experience of recovery please contact This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it or 0141 240 7790 to discuss.

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Story disclaimer

The stories presented here are for information only. They are meant to inspire hope and show that recovery can and does happen. The stories highlight various examples of recovery and we do not advocate any of these experiences as the ‘right’ way to recover. Recovery is an individual and unique process, each person must decide for himself or herself what will work for them. Please carefully consider any decisions you make about your own recovery and consult with someone you trust if you feel unsure.

See our Submit Your Thoughts pages for details on how to submit a story to us or you can contact us.